My Favorite Chapter of my Life

All i want is to erode from my past..
Have you ever been called slut?
And your stupid boyfriends’s asking for things  which is beyond your limitations…
  for you to show him that you do loved him…
SEX is not the answer for everything… its taking care for each other and of course
  the companionship.. repecting one another.. and LOVE.
Well..
That’s the most painful thing that ever happened to me.
Of all people! Damn!
I’ve never expected that.

Then I decided to hide the real me.
I just want to evanesce, so that i won’t remember the burdens in my life.
Each night, i smoke rapidly..
Why?
Why can’t you just accept me?
I’m tired of your rant voice.
Enough!!!

Then I decided to meet new friends.
Every week we hang around.
Then one night..
I was busily drinking this damn red horse.
I’ve met this guy..
Well for me, he’s just the same! same with this dumb, lout and raspy guys!
Coz of my experienced, i don’t like to mingle with the opposite sex.
But he became part of my crowd.
And became my friend.

Dumb me!
I never expected that we’ll be good friends.
I tried tellin my self that i can never love someone.
But the more we got closer.. the stronger my feeling’s gettin’.
The last 9-10 years of my life were unfortunate blip on an (otherwise)
  clear screen, and I intended to moved on with my life.
I’ve tried convincing myself that he’s not real.. not sincere..
Guys are deceitful…
I hate them all! They should be cursed!
To hell with them!
For me, I can live without those slob beings (men).

Then the day came…
He told me about his feelings.
Why?!?
This is not real!
Secretly i cried, why did I’ve let it happened?
I tried hating him… I hate him!
I hated him the night he told me he loved me…
I hated him coz i couldnt love myself..
Why are you so kind to me?
This can’t be happening.
I can’t fall for him..
How? Why?
Qs that keeps playing on my mind…

He is a quintessential person.
Then he became my bestfriend.. as my besty he is protective.
He respects me.. a lot.
And that’s one thing that draws me to him.
Am i….?
NO! This can’t be happening!!
I tried pushing him, thru quarreling and insulting him…
I knew i’ve hit his ego, but yet he stayed with me..
isn’t that unfair with him?
But what he didnt know is that im wounded everytime i ‘m mean to him.
And i hate him because he’s only showing me that he’s worth my damn love…
I know right then that he’s sincere, pure…. and different.
But the more im pushing him away from me, the more i want him in my life..
Then he told me, that i need to face reality…
So i decided that i should never run away… I should face him and stop being a
  timid person.

Then i’ve let him in… in my imperfect life.. yet he made it complete.
He knew that I have been seeking for a soulmate..
I guess soulmate is just an imagination.
Now that he have picked the shattered pieces of me… and have solved the
  puzzle in my world…
I’ve learned to love myself…

I guess this is my FAIRY TALE.
We create our destiny, thru our choice and decisions.
We are living in an imperfect world, but a happy place to live with… with him.
We live each day like its the last day of our life…

I LOVE YOU MARK!